Everyone likes to be liked and yet many people go through life, or at least part of their lives, feeling as if people do not like them. This article aims to begin the discussion about what you can do to feel and be more liked - maybe even 'instantly'.
1. First and foremost, remember one rule: people are interested in themselves. So the first step of getting people to like you is simple. All you have to do is be interested. Talk to people about themselves. Ask them their opinion about things. You can get someone to be so self absorbed in their conversation that you can predict or lead their responses. But remember, don't just stand and nod. You have to lead the conversation, making sure that it stays about them and they believe that they're the one in charge. This skill might take practice!
2. Don't forget eye contact whenever you talk to anyone. This will make you seem confident and like you care about what you are talking about/who you are talking to.
3. Talking about negative things or complaining about how things are going etc, leads to negative emotions and sometimes can make conversation stoppers. Don't complain about your day, and don't talk bad about people all the time, if ever.
4. Just be yourself. If you're not genuinely interested in someone you will find out soon enough. It just takes a little bit of selflessness in showing interest, controlling your emotions, and being yourself to get to know somebody.
5. Look like a friendly and attractive person - and this does not mean you have to have to dress in the same way as everyone else! You just need to look open, honest, natural, friendly, outgoing and clean. This is important because most people make a judgment about someone that they meet for the first time within the first thirty seconds of meeting them. Even before they speak to you, they will have normally decided whether you seem like "friend material". Don't wear anything people may perceive as offensive, as in lots of piercings, grotty t-shirts with lots of flames and suchlike and costume makeup. This makes you seem unapproachable.
6. Adding onto appearance, be clean. Having washed hair, unbitten nails, clean teeth and fresh smelling pits really makes you more appealing to the people around you.
7. Look alert! Make sure you do not look as if you are wrapped up in yourself, or distracted in some with other things. When meeting a new person it is vital that you show you are interested in them.
8. Make appropriate physical contact in an appropriate and positive way, maybe this will mean shaking hands or even possibly greeting people in a slightly more 'intimate' way. You need to appear confident and positive in all these things in order to start the process of conveying likableness in the right way
9. Smile. Simple as that. But make sure it's not a fake smile. Smile from your eyes, as if you're truly happy to be meeting someone or speaking to someone. But don't overdo it either. To much smiley-ness can seem creepy. If one person smiles, it makes everyone smile!
10. Give a lively and pleasant tone to your voice. Sadly some folks develop a monotonous, or dull sound to their voice. Maybe they talk in a squeaky or affected way. In this matter you need to be truly self-critical and, if you feel you are lacking, you need to make an effort to develop better speaking-voice qualities. It can be done - actors and actresses do it for a living, and once you develop confidence in yourself and the way you sound many of the other attributes of 'likableness' will fall into place.
1. First and foremost, remember one rule: people are interested in themselves. So the first step of getting people to like you is simple. All you have to do is be interested. Talk to people about themselves. Ask them their opinion about things. You can get someone to be so self absorbed in their conversation that you can predict or lead their responses. But remember, don't just stand and nod. You have to lead the conversation, making sure that it stays about them and they believe that they're the one in charge. This skill might take practice!
2. Don't forget eye contact whenever you talk to anyone. This will make you seem confident and like you care about what you are talking about/who you are talking to.
3. Talking about negative things or complaining about how things are going etc, leads to negative emotions and sometimes can make conversation stoppers. Don't complain about your day, and don't talk bad about people all the time, if ever.
4. Just be yourself. If you're not genuinely interested in someone you will find out soon enough. It just takes a little bit of selflessness in showing interest, controlling your emotions, and being yourself to get to know somebody.
5. Look like a friendly and attractive person - and this does not mean you have to have to dress in the same way as everyone else! You just need to look open, honest, natural, friendly, outgoing and clean. This is important because most people make a judgment about someone that they meet for the first time within the first thirty seconds of meeting them. Even before they speak to you, they will have normally decided whether you seem like "friend material". Don't wear anything people may perceive as offensive, as in lots of piercings, grotty t-shirts with lots of flames and suchlike and costume makeup. This makes you seem unapproachable.
6. Adding onto appearance, be clean. Having washed hair, unbitten nails, clean teeth and fresh smelling pits really makes you more appealing to the people around you.
7. Look alert! Make sure you do not look as if you are wrapped up in yourself, or distracted in some with other things. When meeting a new person it is vital that you show you are interested in them.
8. Make appropriate physical contact in an appropriate and positive way, maybe this will mean shaking hands or even possibly greeting people in a slightly more 'intimate' way. You need to appear confident and positive in all these things in order to start the process of conveying likableness in the right way
9. Smile. Simple as that. But make sure it's not a fake smile. Smile from your eyes, as if you're truly happy to be meeting someone or speaking to someone. But don't overdo it either. To much smiley-ness can seem creepy. If one person smiles, it makes everyone smile!
10. Give a lively and pleasant tone to your voice. Sadly some folks develop a monotonous, or dull sound to their voice. Maybe they talk in a squeaky or affected way. In this matter you need to be truly self-critical and, if you feel you are lacking, you need to make an effort to develop better speaking-voice qualities. It can be done - actors and actresses do it for a living, and once you develop confidence in yourself and the way you sound many of the other attributes of 'likableness' will fall into place.
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